I had to drag myself into the outside world to buy provisions and make payments yesterday. I swathed myself in enough clothing layers to approximate a mobile 10 tog duvet on legs , donned my matching flame retardant gloves , wrapped my lower face in a scarf (I’ve come late to scarf wearing and it worries me) and stepped cautiously out the door in a similar fashion to astronaut Neil Armstrong leaving the safe confines of the lunar module to cautiously touch the surface of the moon and me with an almost identical fluidity of movement.
My mile long journey on foot took me past a world of iPod wearers of all ages including the mature, multiple tweenies and a young girl aged around five years old telling her mother’s friend that she’d got an iPod for Xmas (amongst a frankly stunning list of items). She was jumping up and down as she recited her Xmas list, as would I if I’d got anything like the consumer bundle she was reciting. Her Mothers friend was repeating each item back in an annoyingly patronising but bubbly way (I’d need chemical help to sound that enthusiastic).
I had begun to think I was the only person in a 2 mile radius who did not have an iPod.
I finally got to the post office and shops and two pavement teens turned their heads as I approached to reveal that both had a single iPod between them linked by a pair of white in-ear headphones each (I kid you not). A communal iPod no less.Their perfect mouths were open with their perfect eyes opened wide but signifying that neither was currently home though both instinctively were able to turn their heads ,tracking me in unison whilst their mouths stayed open.It was all a bit Village of The Damned.
Perhaps they had never seen a walking duvet before.